10 o’clock at night. I was upstairs at the back of the house with the door closed almost asleep. Dad, 160 pounds, was downstairs in the front of the house when I heard a big thud. Rushing down, I found Dad on the floor. It didn’t take us a long time to get him in the bed. We actually had a couple of laughs, well gaffaws, while doing it.
But tonight when Rose was supposed to come over, he didn’t want to go out. He doesn’t trust his legs. He has also had some of his spells, but I hated that now he was wanting to keep himself at home.
I joked about how I didn’t want him sitting around all the time. It was an opportunity to disspell his concern that I didn’t want him out. But he seemed so depressed and wasn’t at all interested when Queen and I were talking about how he could exercise his legs.
But later I saw him doing some leg lifts and then he asked how much a stationary bike would cost. God bless him.
A year or so ago, sitting in the Newark airport I saw a sign about Nola Ochs, a 95 year old woman who had just earned her college degree. Well, I had to do a lens about her, the link is above, and also found more wonderful really old people who were still doing amazing things. There was a 109 year old blogger! 100 year old who were sky diving (no thank you).
And I just found this picture with an article about a 102 year old Harley ‘biker chick’.
Ya, Dad isn’t going to make this list, and maybe not your parent. But we can do it! (Note to do the Pilattes machine again tomorrow!)
Rose came over tonight for a second visit this week. She took Dad out to get groceries and presumably dinner. They got back awfully early, without dinner. When I asked Rose she commented, “He fell but he doesn’t want you to know.” Why on earth not, I feel so bad.
Rose said that he thinks ‘we’ don’t want him going out. That wasn’t me, it was the doctor. When he comes in, I drop hints all over the place that I really like to see him go out. Go out more….
Its so sad that he thinks I want to keep him in. What would you do? How would you get the message across.
I found this while Stumbling. Great list!
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When I was a kid I read an essay that said that pessimists are the lucky people. The theory was that most things are disappointing which gave away the author. He went on to say that optimists are continually disappointed. If the plane lands a half an hour late, the optimist is disappointed. If it lands safely, the pessimist is delighted. Since it is late much more often than it doesn’t land, the pessimist is set up for a lot of happy times.
However, I tend towards optimism. That is not to say that I don’t have the normal amount of anxiety and fear, or days of just wondering how I am going to do it: but I am an optimist.
I have feared that we wouldn’t get the right help for Dad, but I really knew that we would. I worry about money, but know we will find it.
Optimism has worked for me. Yesterday, I had a great day planned. My appointments were lined up perfectly, five of them and I would be able to be home early. Yea! Then after #3 I couldn’t get my car out of park. This had happened a few times, but I messed with it and I went. Not this time. I had to call a tow truck, glad that I had renewed by AAA. He got it started so that I could drive to my mechanic, it took an hour and $40. So what’s to be optimistic about? Well, it didn’t happen when I was in the middle of no where. The two missed appointments could be resceduled. The truck came quick and while I was waiting to fix it, I went to Third Place for lunch and met someoneI hadn’t seen in months.
There! I was right. Now, I could have looked at this from a pessimisitc perpectic. Would I have been better off?
What do you think? Is it possible to become more optimisstic, assuming you want that.
Me? I think that it helps me with the task at hand. Even if I’m wrong.
I knew Rose from several different places in Raleigh. She kept popping up. I guess we were meant to be together. She has some amazing talents, one of which is working with human energy. She was taking a course in health issues and I volunteered Dad as a guinea pig. He was skeptical, but liked Rose. One day he came in and showed me how much higher he could lift his foot.
But the real thing happening was that they started to talk and talk and talk. Rose and Dad truly love each other. She says that if she were 30 years older he might get her to switch from being a Lesbian! The fact that she is makes it easier for him to have this friendship/romance. He is able to have the good stuff, the love, the flirting ,without any worry that he was stepping out on Mom.
Rose comes once a week, on Wednesday at least. Its date night and they usually go out, unless Rose works late or Dad doesn’t feel good. They go out for beers, they get pedicures together. Rose talks about her problems with her love life and Dad counsels and gives advice. He used to think that homosexuality was bad, but know he is an expert. Don’t tell me you can’t teach an old dog new tricks!
Everyone should have a Rose. Heck, I wish I had one.
- Honoring Dad’s Birthday on January 27, 2011
- Dad Died on November 21. 2009; It Was a ‘Good Death’
- Dad Fell Again
- Some Cheer
- What to Do?
- 25 Item To-Do List EVERYONE Should Be Doing
- Are You An Optimist or a Pessimist?
- Every One Needs a Rose
- “Maybe Now You Will Call Me Fritz”
- Cutting Dad’s Meat
- The Bed Is Gone, Dad 1 Health Establishment 0
- The Equipment Arrives